Isambard vs. Southgate II (A) - Friendly

22nd June, 2008

Mat's hat trick seals big win for 'bard

 

Southgate 2nd XI 113 all out (M.Lindsay 5-16 inc. hat-trick, S.Johnston 2-28).  Isambard 114-1 (X.Davis 53 not out, D.Bywater 37 not out).

Consider the work of Kylie Minogue.  At one point in her career, she was merely a comedy popstrel, years of kiddie pop behind her, and reduced to making a guest appearance on The Vicar of Dibley.  Then she records Can't Get You Out Of My Head and is instantly reinvented as nothing less than a cultural icon.  How quickly a ropy period is forgotten following a performance of genius. 
  
And so it was when Isambard visited Southgate.  Some good Isambard teams have visited the Walker Ground in seasons past, yet have not recorded a win - a draw with scores level was the closest we had come to a sniff of victory.  Isambard's recent form hadn't been great (although the team spirit had never been in question); would the return of some key players turn things around? 
  
Fielding first, Ray Collins and Roxy Bywater opened the bowling in the mysterious absence of Mat Lindsay.  Collins' first ball produced an lbw which, in the mind of the bowler, was more plum than an explosion at Hartley's jam factory; whilst his third resulted in a palpable edge to Mark Wembridge behind the sticks.  Neither was given out, to Collins' chagrin.  Roxy, meanwhile, was in frugal mood, his nine overs going for a mere twenty runs and the wicket of enigmatically-monikered opener Dave. 
  
Captain Collins replaced himself with Steve Johnston, who has previously described himself as "more of a batsman".  Stevie J continued his good performances with the ball, dismissing Loganathan to leave the home side 56-2.  By then, Lindsay and fellow latecomer Richie Gardiner had turned up, and the former was introduced into the attack.  
  
Lindsay then proceeded to run through the home side, who had no answer to his pace.  First, Yeomans - please let his nickname be "Stout" - was caught by Richie "I heard people yell 'catch' and saw everyone looking in my direction, so I just put my hands up and it stuck" Robinson.  Ali was then caught by Johnston, then Rolt castled, to leave Lindsay on the verge of a hat-trick.  
  
Now, Isambard have been here before, several times, but no-one had ever achieved the magic three in three for the club before.  Some have come close - our erstwhile 'keeper Kevin Harris missing a stumping which Ray Charles could have taken springs to mind - but we'd never had a hat-trick in 135 matches.  But this time Lindsay bowled, the nervous batsman attempted a forward-defensive, but succeeded only in hitting the ball to Gardiner.  Despite Sir Rich's many skills, you might not necessarily want him underneath a hat-trick catch; after all, he set up a standing order to pay his 'drop' fines last season.  But our Kiwi stalwart came good, and Mat bagged Isambard's first hat-trick. 
  
All this had helped Isambard reduce the home side from 56-1 to 75-7.  Collins rotated his bowlers; Richie Robinson in particular looked sharp, sending down seven economical overs for a mere ten runs - not so much slim pickings as full-blown anorexia for the batsmen.  Xav Davis dismissed Barham, Johnston had top-scorer Hughes caught behind, and Alex Robinson trapped home skipper Stokes lbw in his last match before a knee operation.  Fittingly, Lindsay dismissed last man Hughes to capture a five-wicket haul and ensure he could spend the rest of the day in the bar. 
  
After tea, Davis and Collins opened the batting against some earnest but wide-ish bowling.  Collins got a little too excited at the prospect of runs, and holed out for nineteen, bringing Bywater to the crease.  Roxy took the opportunity to top up his career average (which must have reduced to, ooh, eighty-odd) with a not out innings, whilst Xav continued his recent excellent batting form (for Ricky, alas) with a chanceless unbeaten fifty.  High spot of his innings was dispatching the opening paceman onto the tennis courts, which is a big hit on a big ground.  Isambard reached their target in sixteen overs with few alarms.  A great performance. 
  
Isambard then settled into a pleasant evening in the bar with the home side, during which Mat Lindsay set another record - for most jugs of Fosters purchased post-match.  This excessive libation (admittedly of piss-weak Aussie lager) was then followed by an impromptu game of tube cricket travelling home on the Piccadilly line.  Reports of this suggest that Lindsay bagged three wickets and Davis continued to hog the strike.  Presumably Boycott's traditional advice of playing most of your shots in the 'V' works well on the underground?  Anyway, an excellent effort by the team, despite the difficulties of playing cricket in a tube carriage - not the least of which being the alcohol ban.  As Roxy said, "Thanks Boris, loving your work." 
  
Match report by Allan Smithee. 

 
 
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